Dad, look what I made…

February 10, 2009
Mack has found a new passion in life- he makes weapons. I guess I should be worried that my 8-year old son has fashioned a completely functioning crossbow out of rubber bands and old chop sticks. Or maybe I should be alarmed that he acquired the knowledge to build such a weapon from You Tube videos titled “Homemade weapons”. Lastly, maybe I should show a little parental concern because Cayden just shot through the kitchen with a pie-tin sized bull’s eye taped to his back- but I’m not concerned. This statement probably makes me sound like a horrible parent but I can explain.

The reason my panties remain un-bunched is that so far every weapon that Mack has built is pathetically inadequate for taking down Cayden sized prey. I’ve seen several of his creations throughout the weekend and I believe the majority of them are as benign as a feather duster. He has a homemade BB gun made from a mechanical pencil, a dart gun which used to squirt water and the above mentioned chop stick hurling crossbow. He told me the other day that “he was born to make weapons”- that admission was a bit unsettling. No parent wants to announce that their child is an international weapons manufacturer at the local garden club meeting- unless of course the club meets in Baghdad.

The one piece of this new found fascination that does concern me considerably is that the Marine in me can’t stand to see an ineffective weapons system and the tinker-er in me has the technology to make those weapons better, stronger, faster- sort of like the guy who rebuilt Steve Austin after his space ship crashed in the 6-Million Dollar Man.

So when Mack wasn’t looking I tinkered with his dart gun and increased the muzzle velocity on the damn thing by approximately 300%- enough to fire a tooth-pick clean through a ½ inch piece of sheet rock (our dining room wall happens to be made of that material this is how I know the thickness, whoops). Smelling a potential law suit I quickly reversed the modifications I had made and put it back on the counter.

Note to self- deny my services if Mack finds “You Tube” directions for homemade hand grenades.

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Pam posted the following on February 10, 2009 at 11:58 am.

Too funny (and true!) I remember when my sons were about your kids’ ages and they were quietly and intently working on something with two of their friends with paper and crayons. I figured they were maybe making treasure maps or something. When they were done I found out they were drawing bombs and those throwing star-thingies and cutting them out and taping them all over the house to blow everyone up!

Heather posted the following on February 18, 2009 at 2:26 pm.

Oh, Shane, I know your pain. Does this have anything to do with Noah and Mack’s playdates during the past week? We have more homemade weapons here than I can gather at once to toss in the trash.
Thanks for the laugh!

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